to carter, on the occasion of your eleventh

"Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."

-- Dr. Seuss

Dear Carter Christopher,

There are three memories from the past year that will mark for me the year that I said to myself, My goodness, he is coming into his own.

1 On our beach vacation this summer, you told an original joke (or so you claimed). Typing it here would fall flat, because it could never match your delivery that had me in tears. You held the room without trying and released the punchline with perfect timing. You wanted to be funny, and you were. It was legitimate humor that made me so proud, because one day you'll understand that good humor can carry you through a heap of hard times.

2 You and Lukey helped to purchase your own Gizmo watches, which means you now have a phone number entered into my phone. Your profile was listed as "Little Man," and when you saw this, you said, Ughhh. I don't like that. And so, you're now just Carter in my phone. It was a little sad for me - I've called you LM since you were in utero - but you're growing up, and you get to decide what nicknames you like or don't like. I'm glad you told me.

3 You played on a flag football team that was reminiscent of the Bad News Bears. You won exactly one game, and I think it was the very last one. Mid-season, you told me how terrible the team was, and I appreciate that you owned it, with no sugar-coating, and persevered anyway. You'll have to do that many times over this side of heaven, so it's good that you're learning that now.

Your mom and dad have some memories from this year, too, and it's important that we document them, because sometimes it's hard to stop and remember moments that matter.

I'd describe Carter's personality with these few words:
mom: Curious and kind.
dad: A walking encyclopedia who thinks he's funny.

Carter is most grown-up when he ...
mom: Talks to anyone about sports. He has an encyclopedic knowledge.
dad: Takes the time to speak to and give attention to the 3-year-old neighbor kids.

Carter was proudest this year when he ...
mom: Completed his first ever 5k.
dad: Caught a pass for a 2-point conversation to help his flag football team win a game.

My proudest moment as a parent this past year was ...

mom: When a parent told me how well-mannered and courteous Carter was when he was visiting their home, and how they enjoyed having him over.

dad: Carter apologizing to a friend for things he was sorry for.

Carter's best qualities are:
mom: His excitement for life, his gentle nature around small children, his love for animals, his ability to ask why, his desire to learn.
dad: His gentleness and kindness, his imagination, his perseverance.

The hardest question Carter asked me/us this year was ...
mom: Can I stop [alopecia] treatment? It was painful to him. We realized he was old enough to have a say in his medical care.
dad: Regarding his value when he was feeling worthless.

After his eleventh birthday, I'm most looking forward to ...
mom: More big kid experiences with him.
dad: Our first camping experience.

This is a part of growing up: to be who you are and to say what you feel, and it's such fun to watch you do that. You are thoughtful in how you think, articulate in how you express yourself, curious in how you approach the world, honest in how you process it, and gentle in how you interact with others.

Next year, you'll likely have surpassed my height, but I suspect your heart will have grown, too, and we love watching it all.

Cheers to eleven. We love you.

to luke, on the occasion of your seventh

 "The world belongs to the energetic."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Dear Luke Taylor, 

This was the year you lost teeth, chopped your bangs, played tee-ball, competed on a swim team, joined a flag football league, constructed thousands of LEGOs, went to first grade, (unknowingly) charmed lots of little girls, and remained in what seemed to be a constant state of motion. 

During a flag football game water break, you said to your dad, breathless, Wonder what activity is next? He noted that you sounded out of breath, to which you responded, But not out of energy.

If there was ever a summary of how you experience the world, it is that.

Maybe my favorite thing about you these days is your imagination. You have a knack for creating basketball or football games in your mind while you play them out as a one-man act. You're the coach, the referee, the play-by-play announcer, and multiple players, all at once. It's something to behold.

When you tell us about these contests, you talk about how they happen "in your world," and "not in the real world." Goodness gracious, I laugh at how you dream. What a gift.

If your mind is active, your mouth is hyperactive. Your words come freely and without filter, and if you weren't so dang funny, you'd drive us all bananas.

You still love your brother to pieces, and he loves you, and that means you fight some, too. But mostly, I think you two are as thick as thieves when it counts.

For better or worse, Lukey, you are the baby of the family, and your mom and dad are both eager and sad to see you grow up so big.

Here are a few things they'll remember from this year.

I'd describe Luke's personality with these few words:
mom: Strong-willed, competitive, loving, brave, joyful, energetic.
dad: Toothless chatterbox in perpetual motion.

Luke is happiest when he ...
mom: Is outside.
dad: Is outside playing.

Luke is not-so-charming when he ...
mom: Does not get his way or pushes Carter's buttons on purpose.
dad: Slams doors in anger.

My proudest moment parenting Luke this past year was ...
mom: Watching his push for independence. He has been ready to do many things solo, long before my mom heart was ready for it.
dad: When he decided to make a sign on his own to cheer on Carter and me for our 5k. 

Luke's best qualities are:
mom: He is helpful, snuggly, thoughtful, and loving.
dad: His energy and his helpfulness.

My heart broke a little bit this past year when ...
mom: Kids were picking on him at the beginning of the school year.
dad: He started being left out of playing with Carter and his friends.

The hardest question Luke asked me/us this year was ...
mom: What do they do with zoo animals when they die?
dad: Why someone wouldn't play with him.

After his seventh birthday, I'm most looking forward to ...
mom: Watching his personality, friendships, and interests evolve.
dad: His smile with all of his new teeth.

Just yesterday, you had a birthday celebration in the green space near your house that included an oversized bouncy house, twenty-something children from your class and neighborhood, and a few fans of yours who share your last name. 

Every time a new guest arrived, you ran full speed to them, greeted them with excitement, and thanked them for coming to your party.

I could have cried every time you did, because you are joyful and enthusiastic and captivated by the world and its experiences in a way that is pure and true.

And this is how life is with you. Everything to you is wonderful. We're just glad to be in your wonderful world.

Happy seventh, Lukey. We love you and every ounce of your energy.